Does Words Really Hurt?

Have you ever heard the saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me?” If you have, did you ever wonder what this meant? In my childhood when we used to say this it showed toughness. It was saying no matter what type of words we were called, we shouldn’t let that affect us in any way. But the truth behind this that we weren’t aware of was that words can actually hurt us if we use them in the wrong way. There are words that can curse us causing us to die in ourselves and words that can encourage us and help us grow.

In the Bible, God talks a whole lot about how important words are. He started off talking about the basic use of a tongue. It states, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof” (Proverbs 18:21). God tells us that we have to be mindful of what we say about ourselves and even others because we can either curse or bless ourselves/others. The last part of this verse can give you the chills. If you are saying horrible things about yourself or someone else, it can cause you to eat the fruit of it, meaning you will be held accountable for what you said about that person or even yourself. If you decide to say anything about someone, make sure it is good to build them up and not to tear them down. This also applies to what you say about yourself.

Another scripture you should pay close attention to is Proverbs 26:2, “Like a fluttering sparrow or a darting swallow, an undeserved curse will not land on its intended victim.” When you say something bad about someone, if the words you said are an undeserving curse, it will not land on them. Chances are it can land on you instead. We know this is true because the word says we will reap what we sow (Galatians 6:7-9).

Words that are used to tear down a person can happen through gossip as well. A personal experience that I had pertaining to gossip was when I shared information about a third party without malicious intent. But the information I shared ended up ruining a life situation for the person through the hands of someone else’s intent. Even though facts were shared, the outcome had a negative impact.

So you see words can be dangerous depending on how you use them. You can simply destroy a person’s reputation or life without trying to do it intentionally. Words can make or destroy relationships as well. It is nothing wrong with deflecting gossip when it is presented to you. A recent instance where I had to deflect was when a co-worker was venting to me about our manager and why she did not like her. I listened and once she was done talking, I asked, “Have you pulled her to the side to tell her everything you are telling me?” She said, “No, why

would I do that?” I said, “It will be better for you tell her so that you won’t be walking around upset.” She looked at me and walked away.

The bottom line was I recognized that my co-worker was trying to get me to come into agreement with her views on our manager. I wanted her to understand that receiving the information from the co-worker had no benefit to me and the opinions needed to be shared to the person who was involved.

Whatever you do, make sure you stand up and be the bigger person. It is nothing wrong with you saying you don’t want to be involved in how that person feels. You can listen, but you do not have to react. If you do decide to react, remember that whatever you say, you will end up regretting it later.

Syreeta R. Fields

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